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A LINK TO A FREE VCD PLAYER FOR YOUR COMPUTER
Counter installed on August 16, 2004
”4 Days In Panties” 65min
Directed and written by Nick Esposito, shot and edited by Tivoni Devor, Produced
by Nick Esposito and James Lynch
Starring James Brown, Suicide Chloe, Conrad Stojak and a host of half naked
nude models!
In the tradition of “Boys Don’t
Cry” comes the first strap busting feature from backseat conceptions!
James Brown plays himself, a hairy palmed internet porno freak with a stalking
streak. After diverting his tour bus to Portland he attempts to win the heart
of one of the most nubile and supple Suicide Girls (Chloe) with his charm. After
that he decides to take a more logical course of action and dress up like a
girl so that he can carry on a lesbian relationship with the nude model. French
Hardcore Sensation Beret! star as the girls abusive French boyfriends. Beret!
will stop at nothing to ensure the Suicide Girls fidelity and smash any one
who mettles with their relationships. James Brown (cleverly disguised as Jamie)
is accepted into the secret world of women. A world packed with recreational
breast cancer screenings, Anti-Flag references, opium fueled poetry, and girl-girl
country-western karaoke parties. He is forced to use his wits and natural sense
of femininity to navigate this world which is so alien to him. With the constant
threat of Beret!’s savate (French foot boxing) skills looming above his
wigged head, Jamie may have bitten off more than he can chew. Or has he?
James Brown undercover cross-dressing is made all the more difficult by the
hyjinks of his wacky, offbeat, alcoholic friends who are constantly getting
underfoot as they try to get under the real girls skirts.
Featuring over 12 Suicide Girls, Conrad “Ass Man” Stojak from Cheese theater, Beret! and more pussy jokes than you can shake a stick at "4 Days In Panties" is a unique comic Motown which will truly have you saying “What the fuck is this? I didn’t order chili!”
A hotshot cop with only four days left on the force is
forced by his hard nosed Sergeant to go undercover as a female nude model! Someone
is raping and killing beautiful young internet models and the police have no
leads. Will this gristled veteran from the mean streets of NYC be able to convince
the killer and his naked co-workers that he is in fact a sexy barely legal co-ed.
James Brown (Smoke Pot Till You Fuckin’ Die, Glory Hole) stars as “Jamie”
the barefisted transvestite cop who with the help of Chloe (Played by Suicide
Girl: Chloe in her first steaming starring role) the quick witted vixen rookie
cop with a lot to prove and even more to show off! Will “Jamie”
be able to crack the case before more girls are murdered or will the nubile
Chloe become the next victim of the murderous perverts DOUBLE EDGED KNIFE!
4 Days in Panties is a unique DV native feature film. 4 Days was commissioned jointly by schlock luminary Troma Entertainment, west coast indi-porn sensation the suicidegirls.com and the French hardcore band Beret. The intention: make a film in 4 days which featured and promoted all of the involved parties while staying true to it’s derivative form. The film is about an obsessed internet porn fan and “Trauma” employee who pretends he is a woman to have a lesbian relationship with a nude model. While his obnoxious friends interfere with his plan he learns about the secret world of women and, even though he is living a lie, the love that he and his crush develop is genuine. Things go very wrong in the end as the truth is revealed; it appears all hope is lost. However in the end their love for each other is strong and the old axiom “chicks don’t fall for guys in panties” is broken.
4 days was filmed in 4 days with a crew of less than 5 people
and a budget which consisted of dinners, beer and pizza. I met up with lynch,
larry, nicholle and Jason Stevens in Los Angeles where I had been living in
a van for a week while I worked on the initial elements of the Gray Kangaroo.
On the drive to Portland we discussed shooting a short piece with the suicide
girls, I had a short idea based mainly on my observations of their behavior
during our live show on the warped tour and my personal experience with one
of the girls.
Initially spooky was unreceptive to the notion of shooting anything with us.
But we were persistent and with the help of Jason Stevens and Mia the Suicide
Girl I was able to convince spooky that we were there to do what we claimed
and that we were not there to get laid, a wise decision. Spooky was helpful
and amenable. He said that the shift in his attitude was based on the girls
interest in the project.
I did pre-production for about three days, casting, getting locations and dealing
with various logistics during the day and writing the script at night. Every
night I would go to a gas station and get the largest soda cup they had fill
it with ice then coffee, after I was finished with the coffee I would fill the
cup with whiskey. By the time the whiskey was done it would be the morning.
One of the nights I got through my task additionally fueled by the erotic photos
which were being sent to be via email by a young girl I had met in Kansas.
The cluster fuck pre-pro was aggravated by the fact that troma ent. was severely
in debt to me and the whole crew, weeks behind on pay as well as thousands behind
on un-reimbursed expenses dating back months. We were all near penniless with
some of the crewmembers totally broke. I had about $160 in my bank account which
got me through pre-pro occasionally buying some of the broker crewmembers basic
items.
The main crew was traveling up from San Francisco when the dirty Erin lost her
transmission and they were stranded an extra few days until they could bribe
the mechanic to work on the weekend. As the production manager of the tour I
had certain accounting duties which were required of me. Zafer (coach) handled
the majority of these tasks using the extra time he had when he was stranded.
In the end whatever work we did on the financial end for troma was for naught
as they declared it was all too late or contained errors, so would not be respected
and there fore no one was paid anything not even a few of the large indisputable
receipts(months later after the tour they paid all of the expenses without issue)
so the crew was for the most part penniless.
As the script developed, our layover lengthened and I was presented with the
numerous female talent; the film grew from a short to a longer movie. I had
originally intended to produce a short extra for the DVD of ToT which would
showcase mudshark mark (one of our crewmembers) masquerading as a girl. It was
a basic derivative structure and had three or four female roles in it. At the
SG casting I was presented with no less than 13 nude models that were hot to
be in our movie. God dam it if I wasn’t going to get them in somewhere.
I added new ensemble scenes to the script as well as adding gratuitous nudity
which I had never intended to be in the film.
The bus was only about 20 road hours away, and I was hopeful that it would arrive
in a day or so, in reality it took about 5 days. Initially we were staying with
lynch’s cousin an activist in Portland who was working to unionize the
strippers, we stayed with him until we wore out our welcome. Then the 5 of us
moved into a motel room on the outskirts of Portland.
During this time I was carrying the secret that ToT had been canceled by troma
management due to poor financial showing. I didn’t want to tell the crew
I was with until the termination was %100 so I told them not to count on anything
and awaited word form coach who was dealing with troma and trying to keep us
on the road. Eventually the news came and we were officially relived of our
responsibilities to ToT. An additional disturbing element was that Mudshark
mark had fled ship with a few other crewmembers. I cast James Brown as the lead
and his rare and palpable acting skill added dimension and quality to my garbagey
movie, also having been on the road with him sleeping just feet away from him
every night for at least a month I was able to write lines in his syntax which
I feel greatly added to the script.
By the time that the bus transmission was replaced and they were on their way
to Portland it was clear that we were not going to be able to catch up with
the tour as it was speeding across the country that paired with the fact that
we were fired made us decide to stay in Portland for a week and shoot more of
a complete film. The bus’ arrival was further lengthened by a brake failure
related headlong plunge down one of the steepest and most dangerous roads in
America 101. After a $20 brake adjustment Ole Dirty Erin was back on the road
and made it to Portland. They arrived, we had our celebration and quickly debriefed
them on the shooting plans.
The first scene we shot was in the video game store, the mood was tense, I had
only met these girls once or twice and was basically rolling on skill. I have
been involved in the motion picture industry professionally since I was 17years
old, I have worked in many capacities. I have never (since I had a cable access
TV show when I was 16) worked on a production as ramshackle as this production
was. We simply had no choice, I had a camera man, a dv cam an assistant director
and that was it. We had no lights, no grip equipment, no money, no industry
contacts and most importantly no time to set things up “properly”.
All we had were about a dozen nude models and a script which was heavy with
pussy jokes and above all me. I won’t try to be humble, let me just say
that I know that I am like a rare spice an I should be used sparingly if at
all. I was in this movie too much. Unfortunately when I was writing the script
I would imagine the conversation and write in what I would say on the other
end of the conversation as a placeholder and then in later revisions transform
my lines into the utterings of another character and replace various placeholder
dialogue and jokes. Unfortunately there wasn’t time for most of that revision
either so we shot the movie with me in it and a lot of placeholder jokes. You
can see my unease and upset with the whole process and state of the script in
my muttering performance in the first ensemble piece in the movie (when I am
wearing all camouflage). I am not ashamed of the movie as it turned out but
it is only because of tivoni’s very competent editing skills.
The shooting was as you can imagine very fast paced. We stopped only to drink
at the end of the day which we did to excess. Often, especially at the end we
had no locations booked and went by the skin of our teeth. On the third shooting
day at the Paris theater I was three hours late because I had to be a Kinko’s
and get final paperwork to troma in order to hopefully get some money for the
guys. I was so broke that I had to slip out the door with out paying my bill
which was over $50. I arrived at the Paris theater and after I saw that they
had drank all of my wine I picked out the most flattering dress I could find,
put it on and tried to pick up where the guys had left off in terms of shooting
while I was at Kinko’s. Then we shot the alternate ending which Zafer
directed because he knows how to shoot that horror shit, it looks great.
Some people might complain about the lack of breasts and gratuitous sexual content
in this film. You should understand that we had just met these girls, were paying
them nothing, offering them nothing and trying to make a real film. I didn’t
show up to make some kind of titty reel for the SG WS fans to jerk off to. If
they want to jerk off I hear there are some pictures on the sprawling online
community that the site is.
I regret that the scene where chole and james smoke opium isn’t more sexual
because it’s a major plot point. When we shot that it was 3 or 4 am we
had been shooting all day. It was just Tivoni,, James myself and Chloe in her
house. If I was her I would have felt nervous. I think she might have also been
getting some flack from her live in boyfriend whom she supported. Another thing
that was amusing about that shoot was that Chloe wasn’t experienced in
movie sex. And if James was he wasn’t going to do it apparently. There
is a lot of fingering content in that scene and it was hard to relate to the
actors that just because his hand was near there it didn’t have to touch
anything down there. I tried to illustrate that fact first by jamming James’
hand near my own crotch. When that method failed to alleviate tensions I tried
to calm things by putting a book between her legs as a shield for his hand
but that was deemed to bulky, then we tried a cd case which
was then replaced by a roll on thing of anti-perspriant which was curved just
perfectly so that when it was placed between her legs and his hand was placed
against it the plastic dispenser made direct contact with her clit and achieved
the exact opposite effect than what I had intended. The deodorant shield was
quickly nixed as feasible. If your going to do a fingering scene, with miniskirts,
rehearse and block it out. So in-between the fingering misadventures, the fatigue,
the outside elements, the lengthy dialogue and the no rehearsal that scene
wasn’t
as hot as it should have been.
The last day in Portland was after a great deal of drinking the night before.
We were at a bar where we had befriended the very attractive female bar owner
yet after quite a bit of small interactions she was forced by the privatized
state liquor control board to evict our whole party from the bar. James Lynch
who was my co-producer on the project had footed the bill that night and was
considerably and understandably irate at the idea that we all had to leave
when only a few of us were intoxicated to the point of ejection. Lynch took
the opportunity as we stood outside the club to remind the bouncers that they
lived small lives and that he had just dropped more money that night then they
made all week because they lived small lives, he also mentioned his inclination
to push their grandmothers (who also lived small lives) off a cliff or under
a truck, (I’m not sure
which) the because they lived small lives. It is a shame that we don’t
have that on tape but while it was happening tivoni and Conrad were shooting
the stinktoe.com bit which Conrad saved by creating the character miroslav.
So when we awoke on the last day of shooting we were a bit tired and had nothing.
No locations just a bunch of scenes. We hooked up with this guy who was a Troma
fan and he let us shoot some stuff in his apartment. We bribed him with the
entire troma catalogue to let us shoot in his apartment all day and skip some
galla fishing trip he had had planned for weeks. He did and we shot the cat
box thing, Illya’s insert and the breast cancer scene in his apartment.
Me and zafer had tried to secure a yoga center as the breast cancer clinic
a day or too before and the pained expression on the faces of the owners of
the center as he read through the script was a clear indication of the act
that we would have to rely on other sources for our pussyfest. As a sidebar
that guy loved us in the end when we had 5-8 topless girls in his room. Nice
guy.
After looking at the suicide girls site at a seemingly endless parade of attractive cool girls let me allay your dreams of a whorey paradise. Fo me it was akin to having 10 simultaneous relationships with high maintenance girls friends who gave me exactly no sex. Not that that’s a bad thing. I always try to avoid any sexual contact with talent while we’re in production, it’s hard on the girls but hey I got a job to do.
All told it was fun to work on and though it's pretty shitty, it's got a good spirit to it. 4D1 is rock and roll it's fast cheap, sloppy and it was made by people with no food. Special thanks wo everybody who worked on it especially JAmes, Chloe "Katie Suicide" and Tivoni.
